Because of what we do here at American Craft Beer – and because we’ve attracted an audience of dangerous hopheads who’ve nowhere else to go – we get shipped all kinds of random promotional items to review. And one of the things that we receive constantly is hangover cure products. We’re not sure what that says about us, or about you – but we’re thinking it’s probably not the best.

So in yet another effort to help you manage your troubled lives… Welcome to ACB’s Latest Guide to New Hangover Products.

Blowfish for Hangovers – In spite of its trendy name (and its hefty price), this magic cure is no more thana mash-up of two, age-old hangover remedies: aspirin and a cup of coffee. And although we did find it somewhat helpful at alleviating our headache and helping us to begin crawling out of bed – we have to ask – why not just take two aspirin and spend the money you’d save by passing on Blowfish on a good cup of coffee at Starbucks? Product Grade: D+

Forgiven– This product is described as the world’s first and only alcohol metabolizer, and since alcohol metabolizers are new to us, we’ll have to take them at their word. And unlike Blowfish, Forgiven is caffeine free. Basically what this product purports to do is increase the speed with which the body processes alcohol so it’s out of our bodies sooner. It also claims to maintain a healthy electrolyte balance and to be an excellent source of antioxidants and vitamin C.Basically, Forgiven is a massive shot of B vitamins with some minerals (like zinc) thrown in. Did it help us feel better? We think it may have helped some. Did we feel better faster? The jury’s still out on that one. Product Grade: C

Klarkopf from Swiss Alpine Organics – Klarkopf comes from a Swiss organics company that’s just opened US production facilities in North Carolina, and of the three products that we tried, this one’s our favorite. Klarkopf is specifically formulated to prevent hangovers rather than treat them after the fact. According to the company, hangovers are caused by the free radical cell damage that occurs when alcohol is broken down into a toxic compound called acetaldehyde. When too much alcohol is consumed, the body does not produce glutathione fast enough to detoxify itself before the damage is done. Klarkopf claims to work naturally by boosting the liver’s glutathione production, helping to stop hangovers before they can occur. We tested Klarkopf at this year’s SAVOR, and after drinking 144 beers combined, the ACB crew rose reasonably early and lived to tell about it. Was Klarkopf the reason we all woke the next morning “feeling better than expected?” Truthfully, who the hell knows? But we fell for Klarkopf’s whole preventative and organic thing, and sometimes just feeling good about what you’re taking can make you feel better, whether it really helped or not. Product Grade: B+